


Sodālis

by Vartheta999



Series: What A Pair Are We [3]
Category: Transformers: Robots in Disguise (2015)
Genre: Falling In Love, In doubt of that love, M/M, My Canon, One guy is kind of an idiot, Pre-Canon, Strays AU, mature rating for eventual smut, theres one scene in a cabaret
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-06
Updated: 2019-05-06
Packaged: 2019-10-05 08:30:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 10,764
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17321525
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vartheta999/pseuds/Vartheta999
Summary: Companionship and love are things nearly everyone desires in life.But, one will have to admit, it is scary.[Sodālis means partner, mate, comrade]





	1. Chapter 1

“Nitrobolt!” Steeljaw shouted, furiously knocking on the former's apartment door for the umpteenth time.

They'd been working together for a year now, and so far, they hadn't made much progress. All their plans failed from either being stupid to begin with or the Council immediately brought down their operations—They hadn't been caught yet though, so that was always a positive note to look on.

Through it all, Nitrobolt proved himself to be a great partner. He was a as intelligent as Shift said he was and then some. On the days they weren't busy they'd have long intellectual conversations/arguments and they became great….acquaintances. Not friends. Friends would mean….closeness. They weren't that close….were they?

Anyway, not once in that year had Nitrobolt acted like this.

The usually punctual mech hadn't come around all day. He didn't even answer his calls. Now he didn't answer the door.

 _What was his keycode again?_ Steeljaw thought before randomly punching in the first numbers that came to mind. Thankfully, he was correct and the door opened. He quickly went in, looking around for any trace of the younger mech until, at last, he looked in his room. Nothing.

Then he heard a soft, quiet sob.

His optics darted in the direction from which it came. _The balcony_

“Nitrobolt?” Steeljaw approached the door to the balcony slowly before sliding it open. There, sitting in a corner, face buried into something as he cried, seemingly unaware of his presence, was the bot he was looking for. “Nitrobolt,” He repeated.

This time, he got a reaction as Nitrobolt quickly made an effort to regain what little composure he had, going as far as to extract his visor to hide his optics. Whatever he had in his hands he quickly hid behind his back before Steeljaw could see what it was.

“Steeljaw, I, uh, didn't hear you come in,” He feigned a smile, mouth quivering slightly. “What brings you here?”

“You didn't show up today. I came to check on you,” The wolficon said, taking notice of a few empty scattered cubes of high grade.

“I….overslept. Sorry,” He responded with a nervous chuckle.

“And instead of contacting me to let me know, you began to drink?”

“Um….”

“I have things to do, you know. I didn't have to come here,” He frowned. “If this is the dedication you're showing to our cause then—”

“Look, I'm sorry! I….just wasn't feeling so good today,” He murmured. “It won't happen again.”

“Good,” He nodded, somewhat satisfied. He turned to leave, but he was stopped by a nagging little voice in his processor telling him to stay and see what was the matter.

That little voice had been around for some time now, ordering him to do certain….things. Things such as complementing Nitrobolt on his achievements or escorting him back home. Then there were moments when they were both alone—working on one of their devices or coming up with strategies or just “shooting the breeze”—and he'd stare at Nitrobolt, just in complete admiration for everything he was; highly intelligent, very intuitive, and an excellent shot.

These little things made him….uncomfortable to say the least.

It also made him uncomfortable to admit he did actually, in some way, care about Nitrobolt.

Be that as it may, he still couldn't get close. Nitrobolt was a pawn—even if he hadn't even started to manipulate him thanks to his fragging conscious that somehow decided to finally come around after years of misdeeds—he wouldn't be swayed. He couldn't allow it.

But then….if he chose to comfort him, it may build a sort of trust and dependency, since he was already the only bot who believed and listened to what Nitrobolt said about the Council.

Yes. Offer comfort to further the manipulation he hadn't even begun. It had nothing to do with his—he hoped—nonexistent feelings towards the other bot.

He looked back at Nitrobolt, who was now standing and leaning forward against the ledge, staring down at the city street below.

“Nitrobolt,” Steeljaw began as he stood next to him, “what's really the matter?”

“What are you talking about? I'm fine,” Nitrobolt defended, smiling so wide it looked painful.

“Don't lie to me. I saw you crying,” He pointed out. “And you only partake in drinking like this when you're upset.”

“Well, uh, you….I'm not crying now. You can leave, I-I'm fine, Steeljaw,” He lied, obviously.

 _Okay, what should I do now he's not opening up…._ “Nitrobolt,” He started again, his tone and expression softening. “What's that behind your back?”

Nitrobolt shifted uncomfortably and averted his gaze. “Don't….laugh at me.”

“I promise not to.”

He hesitantly brought out the arm hidden behind his back. It was begrudgingly slow and a little frustrating to the point Steeljaw wanted to just pull his arm. But, he kept in mind he needed to be patient. He didn't want to scare the mech.

“Here….” Nitrobolt finally put it in his claws. “Be careful not to tear it….”

The thing, Steeljaw saw, was a small plush….it looked like a turbofox with a collar. It was worn out, slightly, and looked to be restitched at least 10 times. But, despite its state, he could tell this toy was well loved.

_He was crying into this. Cute. Rather pathetic, but cute._

“Is this yours?” He asked.

“No, it….belonged to my brother,” He answered.

“Brother?” He quirked his brow slightly and looked back at the toy. He noticed a little tag on a collar that read _If lost return to…._ the name was hardly legible but he could tell it was far from “Nitrobolt”. But what brother? As far as he knew, Nitrobolt was an only child. “Where is he then?”

“In a stasis pod on a prison ship. Like my creators….” His mouth began quivering again and a few new tears fell from his face.

_Creators? But I thought Ineritio…._

“Isn't Ineritio—”

“Ineritio left me and my first sire to die when Decepticons attacked Battalion 69,” He cut in furiously, voice full of bitter hatred and his EM flaring with complete rage. “I was just a sparkling, I couldn't even talk yet. The ones who found me afterward, Nightshade and Onyx, adopted me. They are my creators. That bastard never was.”

“ _They_ were your creators? So that means….you're the same Nitrobolt from the war,” Steeljaw realized. Everything made sense to him now. Why Nitrobolt was especially distraught over them and their sparkling and why he especially hate Ineritio so much. _They were his family and Ineritio had them taken away._

“I'm only with him because I was taken under his “care" when I was a youngling,” He frowned. “I had nearly died after a second encounter with Megatron. They were desperate to get me off world….and he threatened to have me and each of them killed slowly and simultaneously while the other watched—he had brought help to subdue them. They begrudgingly agreed to his terms. They kept an eye on me, though, I sent them full reports of my life nearly every day and they did the same. They also secretly sent guardians to watch over me for extra measure and Ineritio hardly laid a hand on me. When the war ended, I finally got to see them again. I got to meet my baby brother, Blitzkrieg,” He smiled slightly as he began to reminisce. “I loved him immediately. He's so smart for a little guy, even smarter than I was at that age and he loved to draw and he adored that little toy, he carried it everywhere. He named it Orion, after Orion Pax….” His expression then darkened. “They threw him in the pod...Ineritio told me how he screamed and hollered before he hit him to make him quiet….and….how he stopped moving….and how he hoped the little bastard was dead.”

Steeljaw expression twisted into one of utter disgust and slight malice.

Primus new he wasn't close to being a saint. Heck, he was the farthest from one.

He killed others, with no mercy and—mostly—no remorse.

But they were never children. That was something he could never bring himself to do, not even indirectly. Hurt their feelings, make them cry, threaten them, scare them; he'd do that in a sparkbeat.

But to kill one? Never, not once.

He was bad to the spark, quite evil.

But Ineritio, what he'd done, that was pure evil.

“That's why I need your help, Steeljaw, almost nobody really believes me,” Nitrobolt started again. “No one, and the ones who might either can't help or don't remember me at all. They don't remember who I used to be. It's like they're under a sort of spell. But you….believe me. You've been helping me, and we have failed more than once, but you still help me and stand by me. Thank you for that….thank you so much….”

More tears began to trail down his face, and Steeljaw grew more….concerned….with each that fell. “Nitrobolt….are you….okay?”

“You know today's Blitz's birthday. Today he would've turned 441 years old. Today he would've gotten his 3rd change of armor. Today I would've given him the biggest hug and told him how proud I was. How he was such a big boy now. How I loved him so much,” He began convulsing, almost violently, as his entire frame wracked with heavy sobs.

Steeljaw didn't know what had come over him when he wrapped his arms around the sorrowful mech and pulled him close.

For minutes that seemed like hours, Nitrobolt sobbed into his chest relentlessly and Steeljaw rocked him slowly back and forth.

There were minutes of sobbing broken apart by short pauses for recovering breaths until they all eventually turned into soft sniffles.

“Nitrobolt….” Steeljaw tried to start but his words died in his throat. What was he supposed to say? Any words he could offer were cliched at best….what else can he say? He cleared his vocalizer and started again, “Please forgive me, I'm the last person to offer comfort. I can't bring myself to lie that things will be okay because I don't know, nobody does. I can't even empathize. I never had a brother, or any family for that matter. I came into this universe alone. There's one person whom I consider family, but I don't see him much. But I will tell you this….Look at me, won't you?”

Nitrobolt lifted his helm and they were face to face—almost.

“Lose the visor. I want to know you're listening. Come on now,” He coaxed him softly.

Nitrobolt frowned for a moment before his visor retracted with a _shhhk_ , revealing his bright, crystalline blue optics. “Good. I promise that we'll make it all better. Even as the world falls down, I promise to always stay by your side, Nitrobolt,” He smiled softly, earning a smile back from the other, much to his….strange….delight.

Nitrobolt really did have nice optics, the prettiest he had ever seen. They were like two pools of the purest energon, so deep he— _What in the PIT is going on with me tonight?_

“....You know what's funny about this?” Nitrobolt chuckled softly. “My creators made a similar promise….to one another when they were younger. To this day, they've kept it.”

“Really now?” He questioned bemused.

“Mhm….”

“Then….we should follow their example....”

“Mhm….Angel eyes….”

“ _What?_ ”

Nitrobolt giggled giddily, “You have such wonderful angel eyes….”

“You're drunk, Nitrobolt,” Steeljaw replied with disbelief and the other mech shook his head furiously.

“It takes more than….1, 2, 3….10 of those little cubes to get me close to even being tipsy. Around 20 to be exact. I'm not lying,” He contended.

 _He's right on that one._ “Why do I have your so-called angel eyes?”

“I just….really love your eyes. And your voice….” He shuddered with a hint of delight. “Divine, simply, divine….I, um, mean this entirely from the perspective of an acquaintance, of course.”

 _For some reason, I find it hard to believe you._ “Are you….” He began to laugh, from sheer amusement or nervousness, he didn't know, “trying to make advances towards me?”

“I don't know,” Nitrobolt shrugged, “why did you start to hold me?”

“You were crying.”

“Okay. I'm not anymore….so why are you still holding me?”

_He has a point, why am I still holding him?_

“I don't mind….Do you?” When he received no answer, he repeated, “Do you?”

“....No,” Steeljaw admitted. _That's not a good thing but...._ “I actually like this,” He turned a gaze to the sky, filled to the brim with stars. “The view is especially mesmerizing.”

“Very.”

They looked back at each other and something just….clicked.

There was something, they both felt it.

Something in the universe had changed….but perhaps the change was always there, however, they chose to ignore it until now.

It was strange, foreign, and quite frightening for both of them.

“Nitrobolt….um….the—”

“Steeljaw?”

“What?”

“Shut up.”

Before he could blink, Nitrobolt pulled him down by his shoulders and kissed him.

Warm.

That was all he could think.

Nitrobolt was warm.

And he made something inside feel warm, too, and….happy.

Apart of Steeljaw told him to retreat, to just leave. But another encouraged him, coaxing him, no, commanding him to give in to his desires.

Steeljaw listened to that second voice as caved into this waking dream, returning the kiss, his glossa meeting the questing tip of his. His hand came up to gently hold the back of his helm, while his other hand trailed down the small of his back.

He pulled him ever closer as their kiss deepened, their glossas sliding, swirling against each other in a dance.

Nitrobolt let out a small whine in disappointment when Steeljaw pulled away.

“Maybe it's better we go inside. You know there's sometimes drones and I know we'd prefer not to be tomorrow's top story,” He frowned a bit as he caught a glimpse of one coming by.

They quickly went inside, Nitrobolt putting a shade for extra measure.

They sat on his berth and for a few awkward moments, they sat in silence.

“So….That was….” Nitrobolt struggled to say, “exciting.”

“Mhm….” Steeljaw nodded.

“So….um….I'm gonna recharge now. Been a….mentally tiring day.”

“Okay. Good. You do that. I'll see you tomorrow,” He got up and headed for the door.

“Wait, Steeljaw,” Nitrobolt called and he stopped. “You could….stay, you know.”

“Come again?”

“I mean your place is already far enough from mine as it is and maybe for tonight you could just….stay. I-I have an extra room you could use,” He added quietly.

Steeljaw looked back at the young mech, who had begun to nervously wring his hands and stare at him with a hopeful glint that shone brightly in his optics.

“Of course. I get the feeling you don't want to be alone,” Steeljaw replied.

“Thanks,” Nitrobolt smiled.

“It's no trouble,” Steeljaw smiled back at him. “Want to show me to that room?”

“Sure,” He motioned for him to follow.

As he proceeded, Steeljaw began to silently question what he himself was doing by agreeing, but he quickly brushed off his doubts with the thought _What could possibly happen?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You're allowed to assume what happens next.


	2. Chapter 2

Shift sighed softly and stretched, lounging backward in his chair with a datapad at hand and a cup of hot tea in the other. It had been a stressful week of helping others and it had finally come to an end. Now it was just him and this exciting romantic novella of two star crossed lovers. It was cliche beyond belief, sure, but it was still sweet and he did enjoy a good love story.

Then there was a hard knock at the door.

He swore under his breath how he knew it was too good to be true and got up to answer it.

“Son of a—Did you kill him too?!” He exclaimed angrily when he saw none other than Steeljaw standing there.

“What?”

“I swear this is the last time I help you because after this you are on your own! You are never satisfied! _You promised me you wouldn't kill anymore!_ I'm frankly tired of this—”

“No, it's not that. I just need advice because….” He sighed, “can we just have a talk. I need someone to talk to..”

Shift paused and finally took a moment to look over him. He looked uncertain and scared.

“Come on. Tell me about it inside,” He said warmly and let him in.

After a few silent moments of getting him situated, Shift sat back down in his chair with him sitting across on another.

“So, what happened that's got you like this, Shep?” He asked him. “You didn't even complain when I took your hand or the fact I'm calling you Shep.”

Steeljaw was quiet for a few moments before Shift repeated the question.

“Somethings wrong with me, Shift. I've been feeling so….strange. Not sick just strange and I don't like it,” He replied with a frown. “Nitrobolt is the cause of it all. He's not at all like the associates I've had in the past. He isn't mindless! He's intelligent and witty at times, he makes me laugh, and….there's something in his eyes that just makes me want to smile….it's unnerving. Meeting him was bad enough,” He scowled. “I couldn't even be around him that night without getting a little distracted by how….he was. And there were moments since then where I can't help but get distracted by him. I act strangely with him, not as I should. He makes me feel different. He makes me feel so….warm….” He trailed off and shook his helm. “I don't like that—Why are you smiling?”

Shift began giggling giddily and uncontrollably as his smile grew.

“My boy, you got something serious. Very serious indeed. I think….” He paused to stifle his unrelenting giggles, “I think you are in l—”

“Don't you dare finish that sentence!” Steeljaw snarled, raring to attack him but stopping himself immediately and retreating to his seat. “Can't you see why that's a problem?”

“....No.”

“Shift, I have spent most of my life being a bad person. I was proud of it. I was proud of manipulating others for my own personal gain, of taking out those who stood in my way, and of so many despicable deeds! I was proud of how borderline evil I felt doing all of that! But then I meet Nitrobolt and the more I get involved with him, the more I know him….it seems so wrong now….and it scares me. This all scares me!” He admitted out loud, mostly to himself. “So much….that it's unnatural.”

Steeljaw frowned slightly and he let out a long groan, staring down at his claws.

“The other night, I found him crying. I comforted him, I held him. We looked at the stars, I looked into his eyes, those bright eyes, and something just clicked….he kissed me, I kissed back. He asked me to stay, I did, and we looked at each other again. It got very intimate after that….”

He paused for a few moments as if trying to gather himself.

“Our sparks meshed together for years in just a few moments. I saw everything about him, I felt his pain and sorrow. And he saw everything about me, everyone I was,” He looked up with a petrified look in his optics. “Everything I did. And he….smiled at me. He wasn't upset or disgusted. He just smiled at me and said I was…. _beautiful._ He told me that he….”  He trailed off and shook his helm furiously. “I couldn't stay. Not after that. As soon as he was out, I left—”

“You WHAT!?” Shift shrieked. “You just left without a word!?”

“....I left him a note....”

“T-That makes it no better!” He sputtered. “You don't do that! He isn't just another one of your one-night engagements where you can go when you please—!”

“Don't you think I know that, Shift!? I regret it so much but at the time it felt like a rational decision! You can see why I need help,” Steeljaw let out a long, frustrated groan. “You're the only….friend I have. As pathetic as that sounds to me, it's true. I value your knowledge above all else. Please, I'm begging you, help me. I really do….care….about Nitrobolt, I don't take pleasure in causing him pain. He's the last one who deserves it.  Please. Help. Me.”

Shift stared at him for a very long time in disbelief. His Shep had really changed, he'd even say grown up. These “new” emotions were always there, they'd been in hiding in the deepest and darkest pit of his spark until the time was right. He was becoming that same young mech with a dream of a greater world, a good world; flawed, but good. It only took meeting Nitrobolt to bring him back.

He chuckled. “That wasn't easy to say, was it?”

“It was agonizing.”

“I can't really help that much. All I can tell you is that….you are lucky to have found a bot you could truly call your equal. Especially for someone like you, you shouldn't let it pass you by or you'll regret it for the rest of your life….” Shift leaned in with a smirk. “And if you're worried about being too old for that stuff, stop fooling yourself. For one, no one's ever too old, and two, you're barely 1235.”

For the first time since he came, Steeljaw cracked a small smile, mostly in disbelief at his attempt at humor. Then he stood up and shook his helm and Shift's hand. Then he turned around and left.

“….Now, where was I?” Shift picked up his datapad again and continued to read undisturbed.

 

For hours and hours, Steeljaw searched for Nitrobolt. He tried comming him but got no answer--which he expected. He went to all his favorite places (that he knew of) and he even went to his apartment and the _Magnificent Mile_ several times, but Nitrobolt was nowhere to be found.

He eventually sat down somewhere to think for a few minutes about his other options. He could simply just wait by his apartment for him to come….but that might scare him off, so would letting himself in and waiting for him. He had already been to the strip club more than once, he wasn't there. It was like he disappeared into thin air.

Primus, he hoped his bastard of a carrier didn't do anything to him or else he'd never forgive himself….whilst possibly being arrested for attempted murder or murder of a government official.

“What do we have here?” A smooth, lascivious voice chuckled softly as its owner stood in front of him. Steeljaw looked up, unamused, and saw a masked bot staring down at him. He could practically hear them smirking as they added. “Well, baby, aren't you a sad little puppy--”

He growled and stood up to his full height to intimidate and scare them off, though it seemed to have the opposite effect.   
They looked up at him and giggled.   
“Did I say little? Mmm, you're a big boy,” They gave him a once over and stepped closer. “Now what can I do to help you feel better tall, dark, and sexy?”

He sighed in frustration, rolling his optics in annoyance and pushing past them. “Thank you, but I assure you, nothing you can do can help me. I don't desire it either."  
"Ooh, don't be rude, puppy,” They groaned after him, but he ignored them.

That is until his audials picked up on them saying something about Nitrobolt, making him stop in his tracks and turn back to them.

“I knew that would stop you,” They laughed. He opened his mouth to say something before they abruptly cut him off. “Now if you want answers, puppy, you gotta come with me to….somewhere more private.”

After a few moments of reluctance later, Steeljaw followed the stranger (who wouldn't stop calling him “puppy”)….right back to the Nitrobolt's apartment building. It was safe to guess that this bot probably lived there as well, as it turned out just a few doors down from Nitrobolt.

After they both went inside the stranger's apartment, they took off their mask, revealing the bot with fiery orange optics and pair of full--for the lack of a better word--kissable lips, and introduced themselves as Blaze. They gave a little backstory about themselves, how they'd been alive during twilight years of the first Golden Age of Cybertron. As soon as the planet fell to chaos and war, they had themselves put into stasis to be awoken when the war ended. They explained how he'd met the _‘wonderfully, devastatingly handsome dream of a bot’_ (their words, not his) Nitrobolt, who was the one who broke him out of stasis after coming upon their pod by chance. The two hit it off right away, becoming quick friends, and Blaze taught him how to pole dance. Nitrobolt turned out to be great at it. They decided to open up a club together, and thus, the _Magnificent Mile_ was born.

“Nitrobolt had his fire and it blazed. But….he was always sad. I know and believe what he says about the Council, but I'm unable to do anything to assist….I'm just a dancer,” He lamented, sighing. “It fragged me up seeing my Boltsy all blue, especially after what happened with his family.”

Suddenly, the forlorn Blaze beamed with pleasure at Steeljaw.

“Then you came in, puppy, and changed everything. I was there when you two met. As soon as I left him I saw you sit with him and talk with him.”

 _So he was that dancer Nitrobolt was talking to when I met him…._ Steeljaw silently surmised as he continued to listen.

“And when it was his turn to dance….his flame blazed into an inferno! I never saw him put so much passion into his performances, and believe me he puts out a lot, but that night….it was like strange magic was at play. Some nights after he'd dance with the blaze, others he danced with the inferno. I wondered, what made those times so different….and it hit me,” They pointed at him. “ _He was dancing for you._ When you were there, he gave his all and more just for _you._ You made him happy, you gave him everything I couldn't. But these past two weeks he's sad again….”

Blaze's swagger swiftly gave away to distress.

“What happened? I mean, I know what happened, the two of you ain't exactly that quiet, _hehehe,_ bet half the floor heard ya. But why the aftermath? That's what I gotta know in order to help you, Steeljaw.”

Steeljaw hesitated, unsure of how'd Blaze would react.

Sensing his hesitation, they cracked a smile. “Puppy, you can tell me anything. My clients tell me everything, I'm basically a therapist--also I have a degree in psychology but let's keep that between us--so nothing will shock me. Hell, you could even tell me you waited till he was passed out and--” They noticed his instant reaction to that, how he winced slightly. “Oh, that's what happened….Why? You seem to care about him. Why would you do that?” They asked calmly as their optics burned into him with an unrelenting stare.

After a few moments of dead silence from both parties, Steeljaw finally spoke up. “I was scared. I've done things in the past I'm not proud of anymore, and yet, Nitrobolt looks at me and sees a good person. He looks at me and sees an ally, a comrade, a friend. He looks at me and sees….someone to love.”

Blaze nodded in understanding. “Do you love him?”

 _Do I love him?_ That was an easy question that was hard to answer. What was love anyway? He heard as a youth that it was a tingly, fluttering feeling in your spark. He never felt that. He felt lost sometimes when he'd look at Nitrobolt, but never like that.

But wait….he also felt alive with him, especially when they shared a kiss under a canopy of stars and what followed after. It made him feel warm and alive. It made him feel right. Happy. So happy.

From what Blaze told him, Nitrobolt was most definitely feeling the same way.

But he left him alone to wake up on his own.

Was that love, leaving him?

But he felt remorse, he was trying to make it better. Not for himself, he could care less about that.

Was he hearing himself correctly?

For once, he didn't selfishly care about his own needs. He was doing it for Nitrobolt. He wanted him to be happy, even if it wasn't with him.

Was this love? Is this how it felt?

“I love him, you know,” Blaze broke his thoughts. “More than anything. What about you?”

Steeljaw, once his thoughts settled, took a deep vent and nodded. "Yes, I do."


	3. Chapter 3

_1...._ _2....3._

Nitrobolt sat by himself, counting to keep his storming thoughts at bay.

Trying to keep the loneliness of the empty room from getting to him.

Each drop from the faucet only took three seconds.

_1....2....3._

Then a _drip-drop._

He should really fix that, it was broken.

Kind of like him. He was broken. But nothing could fix him.

_1....2....3._

_Drip-drop._

He couldn't cry though, couldn't have tears fall from his eyes. The pain wouldn't stop. Just like that _drip-drop_.

Happy, he was finally happy—No, wait, he wasn't happy. _Euphoric_ is a much better word. Yes, he was euphoric and blissful! Oh, so, blissful….how it felt to be held, to feel the warmth of another's frame against his, to be kissed and held in such a way he felt safe and at peace. He'd never kissed anyone before, not like that. Well, he had, but they had been patrons at the club. He was making money off of that. But this was different. Steeljaw wasn't just some random bot off the street looking for a show to get off on. He had been an ally, a….friend.

Why hadn't he been there when he'd woken up?

For the first few hours, Nitrobolt assumed he had some urgent business to attend to. But after days passed with calls unanswered, he lost all hope he'd ever see him again, especially after finding the note.

That night, that promise they made and everything after. All the tender words, gentle caresses, the pain and pleasure….had it not meant anything?

Or….did he scare him away?

He didn't mean to say it.

It slipped out in a moment of passion.

_‘You're so beautiful….I love you.’_

Why did he let himself say that?

In that moment, it felt right. It felt right so so right in the post-coital haze with those amber orbs Steeljaw called optics, that reminded him of hot molten metal, staring down him with such adoration as the owner traced the shape of his face with the tips of his claws.

It felt right.

Did it have to go so wrong?

He should've kept quiet and to himself.

Perhaps this was best because, after all, he was cursed. Anyone he loved was always in one way or another taken from him….his guardians, his best friend, his family….Blaze could be taken from him, too. So maybe it was lucky Steeljaw left, he saved himself from being lost.

Maybe it was better to be alone.

_1....2....3._

_Drip-drop_

He should probably start getting ready soon, he had a show in half an hour.

_1....2....3._

_Drip-drop_

For now, though, he'll just count and watch the faucet.

 _1....2...._ _3._

_Drip-drop_

* * *

 

“Stay fucking still!” Blaze snapped at the wolficon who refused to sit still as they fixed the black liner around his optics. "Worse than a youngling, I swear."

Steeljaw groaned. “What is the point in doing this, Blaze? Why can't I just see him now?”

Blaze broke into a fit of laughter for a second before they deadpanned, “Puppy, you looked like shit and you need to look your sexiest for Nitrobolt, make him go ‘ _ooh-lala_ ’!”

Steeljaw let out a growl in frustration, wondering why he let them do this in the first place. Shift and them would make excellent friends….Primus that'll be a nightmare, two tedious bots who cared too much meeting? He almost wanted to shudder, which he did, earning him another scolding remark with a whack on his snout for extra measure. He let out another growl before he let himself become compliant, going absolutely still.

“So,” Blaze began after they _finally_ finished, moving to pick up a paint gun, “tell me more about yourself. I've already told you a lot about me, but what about you?”

“Why do you care exactly? I've been trying to pin that down since you sat me down and began detailing me,” Steeljaw murmured in reply.

“One, I want the best for Nitrobolt and so do you ergo you need to look sharp. Two, if you're going to be with Nitrobolt, I need to know more about you….” They paused to look through the canisters of paint they had, trying to match them to him. “Is it okay if a paint you a different color that looks like this one? You don't exactly match anything I got.”

“If it gets this over with quicker be my guest.”

It took a few more minutes until Blaze ultimately decided to use a dark cobalt blue. He was ordered to close his optics before they began to paint him.

“Where you from?”

“Hm?”

“Lift your arm please...thank you and I was supposed to be learning about you,” They answered. “Tell me everything you're comfortable with and no lying….I'm a staple in Nitrobolt's life, I need to know you so we can get along. We'll make it a game, you tell me about you and then I'll tell you more about me. ‘Kay, puppy?”

He frowned and mumbled, clamping his mouth shut. Blaze took the cue and kept quiet until they finished with his paint. They picked up a bottle of wax and applied it with a cloth which took a while, especially when they had to wait for the wax to be ready to buff.

Steeljaw still didn't say a word.

It wasn't until after they finished buffing him that he finally spoke.

“I don't know where I'm from.”

“What was that?”

“I don't know where I'm from. I was thinking about it.”

Blaze gasped. “For 2 hours?! I like a guy who can focus but DAMN that's some next level stuff right there.”

Steeljaw shrugged. “I don't really remember where I came from so it's a hard question. Don't even really know how I was created. I was either forged or birthed between creators. All I do know is that I'm 1235 years old. I've changed bodies so many times that my memory....” He trailed off when he realized what he let slip out.

They blinked in confusion, gave him a once over, then nodded. “Oh….you know Shift?”

“ _You know him!!?”_

“Not personally, some of my clients talk about him and the services he provides. Anyway, let's continue with the little game,” Blaze took one of his hands and began filing his claws. “During the twilight years of Golden Age, I emerged from the Rivets Field hot spot and I was put into a servant caste.”

“I was a Decepticon foot soldier named Shep, not far off from cannon fodder, and what are you doing?”

“Sharpening your claws,” Blaze replied before continuing. “By the grace of whatever, that didn't last long. A higher caste mech saw me, took me in, and educated me. He became like a mentor to me. I can't remember his name….but I remember I always called him A-3. There was another he looked over, his name was Orion Pax. Real cute guy, too bad we didn't get past ‘ _hellos_ ’ and ‘ _how are yous?’_. I think he became Optimus Prime after I went into stasis, I don't know, I'll ask Nitrobolt.”

“I had a strong set of morals and was a free thinker. I didn't like what I was fighting for but I didn't dare disobey my orders. Though, eventually, I grew tired of keeping to myself and spoke up about my distaste. My superiors reprimanded me constantly but I persisted….”

“Eventually, A-3 sent me off to find myself. He enrolled me into a school of my choice and I never saw him again but I was always thankful for what he did for me.”

“I was sent—without my knowledge—straight into a field of mines as a result. I bounced from mine to mine, losing apart of myself each time until eventually it was all over and I laid there waiting until I could die.”

“Frag, that sounds painful, I'm sorry about that. Anyway, I got a degree in psychology and graduated with honors.”

“Shift said when he found me, he knew I was alive because I opened my optics when he touched my forehead.”

“I became a dancer/escort because I felt I could reach people a lot better that way….plus it was fun and I made a killing doing it.”

“He gave me a stronger body to help me achieve my goals. It helped, a little, but with great strength came aggressive behavior and I had energon on my hands soon enough. I came back to him and he made me not as strong as before. By then my ideals were already corrupted, I craved power more than anything and I did everything to get it, even killing. I came to Shift a third time when I had really gotten myself into trouble.”

Blaze looked a bit taken aback for a moment as they blinked at him for a few moments. Then they took his other hand and began filing his claws just as they had done with the previous. “So….when the Great War began, like I already told you, I put myself in stasis. Yes, I was being a, as the Earth beings say, a total _pussy_ by not joining the fight—”

“I won't judge.”

“—but the fact is I'm more of a pacifist than anything and a neutral. I have no allegiance to anybody. Then Nitrobolt woke me up two years ago.”

“I joined the ranks of that mob boss Thunderhoof—”

“Hey, that's one of my clients.”

“—with plans to overthrow him and take his place. It took years of hard work climbing his ranks, then a year ago my partner ratted me out. So I killed him and came back to Shift. He told me to find Nitrobolt, telling me that I could be of good use to him, and he gave me this body. The rest is history.”

“I can't say anything but you're an interesting guy to that and….” Blaze stepped back and smiled at him a moment later, leading him to a large mirror, “tada.”

Steeljaw stared at his reflection and he instantly felt a smile tugging at his lips. He was never one for vanity, though he would be an idiot not to notice that he looked very….handsome was probably the right word. His finish looked so smooth and glossy as it gleamed in the light—many thanks to Blaze's waxing and buffing—and his optics had this new quality to them that often came with confidence. He looked new, he looked….young.

He looked young. He was young.

He wasn't that much older than Nitrobolt, few decades give or take.

He had wasted most of his youth after Shift saved him to his adulthood before meeting Nitrobolt being a violent, power-hungry son of a glitch who ran away from responsibility whenever things got too difficult. Meanwhile, Nitrobolt was a war hero and an idol to millions who had spent his life fighting for what's right.

Steeljaw felt a little doubt fall over him. Was it really worth it going after this dream, this hope, to be with Nitrobolt? Did he really deserve that chance to be happy with someone like him? Someone so special?

_I'm a bad person, a horrible vile piece of scrap. Nitrobolt probably—_

Blaze interrupted his thoughts when they began tugging on his arm.

“Don't fall in love with yourself now, that's my job,” They giggled, making him realize he'd been staring at himself for a good few minutes. “C'mon, puppy! The night won't stay young forever and you have a Nitrobolt to swoon.”

Steeljaw got one last look in the mirror before Blaze dragged him away, suddenly remembering what Nitrobolt had said to him that night.

_Nitrobolt thinks you're beautiful._


	4. Chapter 4

"Blaze, tell me this, why am I listening to you? It's not that I don't appreciate the help you've given me, because I am very thankful, but why am I still listening to you?" Steeljaw questioned.

He and Blaze were parked across the street in front of an establishment called _Painted Black_ , a cabaret-esque place that Nitrobolt also secretly owned through Blaze. From how greatly it contrasted the bright and shiny buildings around it by looking almost like a sky with no stars, it was certainly a place that stood out. He could faintly hear the muffled music coming out of it. It was calming to say the least and, without a doubt, he could swear it was Nitrobolt singing, too.

Blaze had just told him his idea to get Nitrobolt and, in all honesty, he didn't like it.

"Because you love me?"

"I just met you."

"Well, maybe it's because I'm a bonafide genius?" They said enthusiastically. After he didn't reply, they let out an angry huff. "If you're going to call me stupid just say it, jeez, don't need to be silent."

"I'm not, it's just your idea seems to be pulled out of a romance novel and I find it….superfluous."

"Puppy—"

"Stop calling me puppy."

Blaze chuckled, "Shoulda told me that earlier, sweetspark, it's too late now. Anyways, _puppy_ , do you have any better ideas?"

"Well, I….I…." He muttered angrily to himself before he let out a long groan in defeat. "No. No, I don't have any better ideas."

"Let's go, puppy," Steeljaw could practically hear the smug satisfaction dripping from their voice as they both transformed and Blaze took him by the arm. He was about to snap at them about it, he hated being grabbed and led like a newspark when they spoke up. "I'm only gonna tell you only once, stay close, okay? Don't need you bumping into Boltsy or him seeing you either. Can't cause a scene…."

They reached the entrance and as both went through, they let him go.

First off he noticed the place had a very expensive scent to it. Literally. The cygars the patrons were smoking were in no way cheap and the drink Blaze got him as soon as they reached the bar tasted very refined.

Kind of like the _Magnificent Mile,_ it had a variety of bots and it was full of energy. The only difference was that it was a lot swankier and, despite all its energy, it was calmer. It was probably because all were to busy being focused on the lone mech on stage who was singing his spark out; Nitrobolt.

Like when he first saw him dance that fateful night they met, Steeljaw was captivated by him. He relished in the way the bot's voice gently rolled over each note with such care and how it seemed to embrace him.

He looked so happy up there like he lived for the spotlight!

But at the same time, there was this overwhelming sadness about him Blaze had told him about, almost as if he had his spark torn out and Steeljaw couldn't help but feel guilty.

 _I promise, I'll never make you feel like this again, Nitrobolt_. Steeljaw thought quietly to himself.

"Right now? I'm a little occupied at the moment…." He heard Blaze sigh and he looked to see a minibot talking to him while frantically gesturing towards something.

"Please! Ye know 'ow the boss gets! I'm beggin' ye, please!" The minibot went on her knees. "Please!"

"Oh, alright. But only because I love taking him for a…. _nice and long spin,_ " Blaze had the sauciest grin plastered on his face when he looked at Steeljaw. "I gotta go quickly handle some business with a client, puppy, but I'll be right back! I promise."

He gaped as Blaze sauntered away, right into the waiting arms of his said client, a ruminacon he immediately recognized as Thunderhoof.

 _Blaze was really serious about that…._ He blinked in surprise as the two disappeared somewhere. He stood alone for a few moments before he frowned. _Now, what am I supposed to do??_

His audials twitched and his gaze softened as he turned his helm back to Nitrobolt.

_I can enjoy the show_

He found himself a particularly hidden place to sit and watch.

"I got one more song for y'all before I'm done for the night and it's open mic time. I think you'll like it. Warning, it….could get a little sad, heh," Nitrobolt chuckled before he closed his optics and began to vocalize. At once, a strange air came over the entire space. An offsetting sadness was the best way to describe it and everyone went silent.

" _It's surreal, how I feel. I try so hard, but still, you don't open up. Emotions….you hold in. Act like you care but still, you don't give a fuck!"_ His optics snapped open and the wolficon saw, just barely, the tears brimming in them. " _And I try to get to know you. But you fade away, yea, you fade away!"_

 _It's me. He's singing about me._ Steeljaw realized.

_"I know you're scared…."_

All of a sudden, his sight blurred and he felt something warm and wet pour down his cheeks. He brought up a claw to touch his face, pulling it back to see tears. He felt his entire frame begin to pulse with a pain that only came with sparkache.  

_"Feelings are spared…."_

He was crying, he was actually crying. Crying when he hadn't felt the need to a moment earlier, crying when he didn't want to. It was like a strange force had taken control of him and put him in complete agony. 

_"'Cause you fade away, yea, you fade away!"_

The rest of the world disappeared, leaving only him and Nitrobolt's voice. He prayed he would finish but he just kept right on, his words strumming at his pain as he killed him softly with his song. He was blinded by tears despite his best efforts to contain them. _  
_ _"And I try to get to know you….but you fade away, you fade away.…yea, you fade away…._ " Nitrobolt's voice became softer and the tempo of his tune became slower as it appeared his performance was coming to a close and with it, Steeljaw's tears lessened. " _You fade….away...."_

The world came back and Steeljaw saw that everyone was quiet.

Then someone clapped and it was followed by an eruption of applause.

Nitrobolt bowed and smiled, leaving the stage for the bar.

"Did a great job, man! Drinks on the house for you as usual," The bartender handed Nitrobolt a glass of high grade.

"Thanks, Cavasia, but I think this is all I'm having," Nitrobolt sighed and downed the entire thing in one try, slamming it back on the bar. "Gotta get home…."

_And try to find the meaning of being lonely…._

Suddenly, someone wrapped their arms around his waist, resting their chin on his shoulder.

"Ah!" Nitrobolt gasped. "Why are you so hot?"

"I was born this way," Blaze chuckled drowsily and nuzzled him. "You're not so bad yourself, Boltsy! "

Nitrobolt laughed, rolling his optics as they let him go so he could turn to face them, "Literally, Blaze, literally. And I know you don't got a fever so what's up with you?"

"Guess!"

 _Let's see….hazy optics, tired demeanor, and they're overheated…_ . _and they're smirking at…._ Nitrobolt followed their gaze to a ruminacon—a regular both here and the _Magnificent Mile_ —sitting at the other side of the club, looking as equally spent as Blaze. "Business?"

"He has anger management issues, but I think I'm about to make a breakthrough with him."

"You should just put up a sign at this point! _'Dr. Blaze, Ph.D.: I'll Make You Feel Good'_ "

"Hmmm….nah! I don't like that idea…." Their optics took on a playful glint. "Call me  doctor again though and I might just kiss you~~"

The two laughed until Nitrobolt abruptly stopped and sighed, becoming visibly sullen. Blaze said nothing but wrapped an arm around his shoulders as a sign of comfort.

"Blaze, do you ever think it's better to be alone in the end? No matter how much it hurts?" He asked quietly.

"I think you shouldn't hurt yourself like that, baby," Blaze paused and tapped the bar thrice, Cavasia giving them a cube of regular grade energon and quickly catching their hand to hold it momentarily before going back to attend to the patrons. They beamed and took a few large sips and continued. "I know you're scared, Nitrobolt. I know you feel so….hopeless. And you're not the only one, baby, you have to know that. He feels that way, too."

Nitrobolt wondered what he meant by that when he heard a piano begin to play from the stage. It was slow at first, and whoever it was pressed the wrong key a few times, but eventually it all came together in a nice slow tune. It sounded familiar, like a song he'd listened to once or twice.

It was nothing more than background noise to him until a very identifiable voice began to sing.

 _"When you were here before….couldn't look you in the eye,_ " He look towards the stage and his spark lept out his chest when he saw none other than Steeljaw. " _You're just like an angel, your skin makes me cry."_

How did he find him? How did he find this place? Wait a minute!

"Blaze—"

But his companion had already gone before he could ask.

Well, if they could leave so could he! He wasn't going to stay here. He couldn't. He needed to go home, he wanted to go home.

At least he would've if he hadn't just stopped and looked back. Crystalline blue locked with amber, and neither Nitrobolt nor Steeljaw could bring themselves to look away.

 _"I wish I was special….you're so fuckin' special!"_ Steeljaw seemed to sing to him and he was rooted to the spot he stood as the melody washed over him. " _But I'm a creep! I'm a weirdo! What the hell am I doing here? I don't belong here._ "

The lyrics weighed down his spark with deep emotion, made worse by the piercing gaze from Steeljaw that somehow managed to be both gentle and firm at the same time. The roots that held him turned to dust and he began making his way to closer to the stage, to Steeljaw.

_"I want a perfect body, I want a perfect soul. I want you to notice when I'm not around…."_

There was barely a few feet between them now as Steeljaw belted out verses, singing to him and him alone as he never broke his gaze.

_"That you're so special. I wish I was special!"_

He saw the hopeful glint in his optics, pleading him to stay.

" _But I'm a creep! I'm a weirdo! What the hell am I doing here?"_

But this was all too much.

 _"I don't belong here._ "

Nitrobolt backed away slowly, before he turned and ran away.

" _He's running out agaaaaain, oooh!"_ Steeljaw's voice became noticeably so despondent as he watched Nitrobolt go. "He _'s running out—He runs! Runs!"_

Nitrobolt looked back at him one last time. Steeljaw silently begged him not to go.

_"Runs!"_

Then he disappeared.

_"Ruuuuuuuns! Ruuuuuuuuuuuns…."_

Steeljaw jumped off the stage—causing quite the scene—and ran after him.

But by the time he made it outside, Nitrobolt was gone.

 _No, no, no…._ Steeljaw looked around, trying to pick up his scent but it was drowned by all the other smells of the street. _Where is he?_

"Steeljaw!" Blaze called him over. As soon as he was in front of them, they began apologizing left and right over their idea and how he was right. However, Steeljaw shook his helm at all his claims and thanked Blaze for the help regardless.

"Then here's some useful bit of info that will actually help. He went that way, towards the apartment complex. He's going home."

Steeljaw nodded, "Thank you, again."

"Don't mention it, puppy."

He transformed and drove down that same direction.

"Good luck!"


	5. Chapter 5

_ Funny….this is where it all started.  _

Steeljaw was standing in front of the door to Nitrobolt's apartment like he had been two weeks ago that night.

Except this time he wasn't here to scold him. 

Why was he here again?

To make peace? To become friends again? To be scolded? To be beaten? He deserved the latter two, there was no doubt. He gladly would let Nitrobolt do both, tear him to ribbons of he must if it meant they could at least talk. 

He raised his hand and took a long vent. Then he gently rapped his knuckles on the door.

As expected, no answer. 

"Nitrobolt, as you may have already guessed, it's me," Steeljaw stated firmly. "I….just want to talk to you like I should've from the start. I'm going to come in now, you're welcome to do as you may with me."

He typed in the code on a keypad adjacent to the door, opening it and stepping in.

It was quiet, not to mention dark. 

He sniffed the air around him and caught on to Nitrobolt's scent immediately. He followed it straight to his room, which was closed, so he pushed it open.

There was Nitrobolt, laying back sideways on his berth with his optics closed, his legs hanging over the side.

Steeljaw sat down on the berth beside him.

They were both quiet for what felt like centuries, not exactly knowing what to say to each other. 

Then Nitrobolt vented out a sigh.

A moment later he sat up, looking at Steeljaw. 

"Why are you here?" 

Steeljaw looked back at him and answered, "To talk. How are you?"

"I'm…." He hesitated, "I'm fine. And yourself?"

"I can't say the same."

"Ah….then you know what, I feel like slag," He spat out and looked away.

They were silent again for a few moments more.

"I'm…." Steeljaw's vents hitched and he exhaled softly. "Nitrobolt look at me….please."

The other didn't comply, only crossing his arms.

"Fine. Be like that then," He furrowed his brows briefly and continued. "I want you to know that I'm sorry. I-I saw your show and the last song that you sang….I didn't mean to! I really didn't mean to hurt you! I shouldn't have left you alone, that was the worst possible thing I could've done to you. Please try to understand that I was….scared. I know that might not be the answer you're looking for but—"

Without warning Nitrobolt burst into a fit of laughter.

"You're scared. Is that what you said? Scared?!" He exclaimed through his unrelenting giggles, with optics full of pain and looking on the brink of insanity. His fist pounded on his berth, leaving a small, noticeable dent. "What do you have to be scared about? Because me, ooh boy, I'm fucking terrified! You know why!? I'm related to a fucking sociopath! Ha, can you believe it?" Nitrobolt clutched at his chest bending over, frame trembling. He was….crying, forcing himself to laugh to mask his weeping. "Don't touch me!" He snapped when Steeljaw tried to put a hand on his shoulder. "Everybody I've ever loved or shown deep affection to he gets rid off! So it's a good thing you left because it made me realize I can't ever love anyone without putting them at risk! Thank you….thank you."

He heard Steeljaw mutter to himself before he stood up and left, the door closing with a  _ click _ behind him. 

_ Good riddance….good riddance indeed! _ Nitrobolt tried to tell himself as he sat himself up and tried to straighten himself out. 

Of course, he would leave again.

Of course, he would leave again knowing the risks.

This was good! This was good! This was good!

Now they could pretend that what happened between them didn't until it became a distant memory! 

It was good he left!

It was so good he left!

It was so great he left!

It was so—

_ I wish he stayed.  _ Nitrobolt suddenly thought, his back bowing and his frame shaking. Pain wracked through his frame, wracking it with harsh pants. He clamped his optics shut, trying to fight his urges to cry. He bit down on his sobs, almost choking on them.  _ Stop crying stop crying! You're weak! You're weak! Stop it! Stop it—! _

He felt someone hold their finger under his chin before using it to lift his face.

He gasped. 

Steeljaw was sitting back next to him with a small cloth in his free hand that he used to wipe away any tears that had fallen

"You want to know what scared me?" Steeljaw began. "You saw everything about me that I never wanted you to find out, all of my sins and the person I was, and you still love me. You're so special, Nitrobolt, and I'm just a….creep, I suppose. But you look at me with your bright eyes and you see someone special, too. That was what scared me."

He stopped, setting the cloth down and taking his hand away, Nitrobolt continuing to hold his gaze. 

"I know a lot of things. I know how to lie and scheme, I know how to fake my death and disappear, I know all the rules and then I know how to break them. You're the only one I'm confused about. You don't make any sense to me at all! Somehow, you are able to make me feel these little things like nothing at all. I admit I've never been happier in my entire life than I have been in one year and a night with you. I don't know how you do it….but the concept of not feeling like that ever again terrifies me," Steeljaw admitted as his hand brushed over Nitrobolt's, latching onto it. "I'm not going to let you go anytime soon."

Nitrobolt's face took on an even dimmer view as he drew in a long intake of air, holding his breath. "W-What about Ineritio? What if he….tries to take you away?"

Steeljaw sighed, his free hand moving to cup his cheek. He stared at him, and Nitrobolt found himself being drawn in by an irresistible force, that of pure love and honest devotion. The wolficon's claws traced each subtle line of his face, his forehead, sloping around his eye, and dragging across his lips, sparking a trail of fire upon him.  He continued to peer down upon him, as seconds dragged into minutes and even further beyond. Time had no power here, no dominion on this realm shared by only two.

"Steeljaw…." Nitrobolt, at last, managed, "why are you staring at me?

He answered by leaning down to touch his lips with his. A tender peck and then an even more passionate kiss. Each time they joined, there was a stronger connection than before. Soon, Nitrobolt was engulfed in his arms, slanting his mouth against his, feeling smooth, fanged teeth against his glossa. 

They soon parted to look at each other, and Steeljaw smiled. "I would gladly sacrifice forever with strangers for a single moment with someone I love….even then, I'll fight just to be with you."

Nitrobolt smiled back. "Can I kiss you again?"

"I don't see why not--mmmmmpphfff…."

Nitrobolt swallowed any more words he had left to say, kissing him full of fire, unrelenting, and desperate, pulling him as close as he possibly could. Eventually, he climbed on top of him, straddling his legs on either side of his lap. Steeljaw groaned, feeling somewhat helpless as Nitrobolt's highly skilled hands slipped between the seams of his chest plating. Alternating between gentle touches and hard grabs, he roughly played with his circuits and whatever vital parts sending sparks of arousal shooting through his frame.

He was left feeling powerless and wondering where he couldn't do much else but slide his hands up to hold Nitrobolt's waist. 

He broke away, suddenly, to look at him. "You feeling okay?"

"Yes…." the wolficon answered, shaking away his daze for a moment. "Why?"

"I was just wondering," Nitrobolt shrugged. "You're a good kisser….have I told you that?"

"Really? I'm not doing much right now."

"Want to change that?" He questioned with a smirk.

Steeljaw couldn't help but grin mischievously. "You really want to go down  _ that _ path?"

"I can handle you now if that's what you're worried about."

Steeljaw chuckled softly, leaning down to an audial and whispering, "Then you are sorely mistaken, Nitrobolt."

"Prove it," He challenged.

Wasting no time, Steeljaw delved into the nape of his neck, sucking and nipping away at any exposed wires as his claws trailed down his back. 

"Oka-a-ay I wa-as wro-ong— _ ooh yes! _ " Nitrobolt cried out, voice crackling with static, sucking in mouthfuls of air as spasms of delight rocketed through him. Nitrobolt found his response to be letting himself slide against Steeljaw, his hips rocking and rolling almost desperately. His partner reacted instantly to the delicious friction playing over his interface array, arching hungrily and bucking up into him, sounding off his pleasure in harsh, uneven growls and choked out moans. It made him only push down  _ harder _ and go even  _ faster _ , grinding against him relentlessly.

They spent several more minutes teasing each other before they decided to take things further….much further. 

Nitrobolt lowered his helm to Steeljaw's, joining their lips as the latter increased his pace with the former urging him on, hips gyrating in perfect sync to match his lover's rhythmic movements. 

Nitrobolt was making all sorts of noises to signal his absolute pleasure, choked out moans and gasps mingled with static, Steeljaw met his declarations with his growls and moans; the gloriously loud and enthusiastic keening moans poured freely from them creating the dulcet melody of lovers at last free.

Their hands would somehow seek out the other’s and twine together, using that as some kind of reassurance that this was truly real and not a twisted game their minds were playing on them. 

They became frantic and feral as they neared the edge. Faster did they dance, stronger did they push against each other, together riding the wild and wonderful waves of sheer ecstasy. A growl of deep, intense craving echoed within echoed from the wolficon, his amber optics bursting with the glow of sexual peak. His claws dug into Nitrobolt's back, grinding his torso recklessly against him, and Nitrobolt cried out in a mixture of pleasure and pain as he arced into the curve of his partner's frame. 

He hit first, throwing his helm back and howling as if a wolficon himself, frenzied explosion of exquisite sensation erupting through him. Steeljaw's claws inadvertently gouged into his back as he overloaded; he made one final thrust within him and freed his guttural snarl into the air, fusing with Nitrobolt's own cry.

They nearly blacked out from the intense pleasure, narcosis settling upon them, and they fell into the berth. 

They vented heavily, and more curious, laughed softly as, through hazy and heavy-lidded optics, they stared at each other and smiled.

Steeljaw drowsily pulled him closer and Nitrobolt hummed softly, pecking his lover on the cheek before he casually drifted away into slumber. "I love you, angel eyes," He murmured sleepily.

Steeljaw smiled softly and closed his optics to fall into recharge with him, but not before he could happily reply, "I love you, too, my bright eyes."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm a filthy fucking sinner XD

**Author's Note:**

> You're allowed to assume what happens next.


End file.
